Cousin Itt’s Pal Eavesdrops On Our Conversation 

My friend and I decided to hang out. He, because he wanted to drink, me because why not. We ended up at our regular place. Disclaimer, we have been to other places. But somehow, especially when we’re not sure where to go, we always end up there. Our friends always end up there. It helps that some of them work there. We had one of those social manipulators with us. The kind of guy who will try to put people down whenever he can then turn it all around so that he’s the victim. 

As luck would have it, Cousin Itt’s pal was sitting across the room from us, eavesdropping on the entire conversation. We were just being silly, not (yet) drunk silly, just bantering back and forth, telling jokes, the kind of conversation that’s fun to watch, even if you’re an outsider. Our friend was behind the bar, not really listening to us, just doing her job. 
My friend is from Texas. Because he sometimes misses home, he’ll wear his Texas Hat when going out. Social Manipulator decided that now would be a good time to try and put me down. So he made a comment about me trying to do harm to someone. I looked him dead in the eye before offering my reply. 
“I don’t kill people. Anymore.” 
Cousin Itt’s friend nearly choked on his beer. Our friend behind the bar looked up and shot me a quizzical look. I shrugged. 
My friend tipped his hat back and took a long swig of beer before he calmly announced, “shit just got real.” 


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